Tag: Kellan Lutz

  • The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)

    First, a refresher. Twilight taught us all young men are monsters whose rampant sexual urges will, without exception, KILL YOU. Their desire to do so is what’s known as “love.” Keep them at arm’s length and you’ll gain a loyal attack dog sure to lay waste your enemies and cause their women to lament. Sure, […]