Our review of the sequel to the “most successful independent movie of all time.” The beginning of the Turtle’s long and not-at-all-slow decline into nostalgic cultural irrelevance. Why was everyone surprised by The Children’s rush to embrace the Power Rangers, less than two years later, when the only alternatives on offer were Disney cartoons and this? Make no mistake: we’ve come a long, long way.
Curse you, David DeMoss, I’d actually forgotten about this movie and now you’ve brought it all back. There’s so much they could have done well with this movie. David Warner as Baxter Stockman, David Warner as Krang, anything at all with David Warner.
BTW, thanks for the Cast a Deadly Spell clip of him as a Lovecraftian sorcerer. I’m a huge Lovecraft fan (even wrote a couple of books about it) and never was able to get my hands on that movie. Bebop and Rocksteady as actual threats! The thing is, David, this movie is so abominable that I actually think Vanilla Ice’s song is the best part.
…
Yes, I said it.
IT’S TRUE.
*inflicts 1d6 sanity loss*
And to comment about why our audience identification character was so much worse in this film than the previous one (and in Transformers). In the first movie, the character didn’t actually step on anyone’s toes as you mentioned. We got time with the Turtles.
Time with April (the ACTUAL audience identification character people forget serves that purpose even if she’s female and thus impenetrable to the intended 14 year old male audience–honest to God, no pun intended there). The thing is, Redheaded Kid I barely remember (checks IMDB) , DANNY, gave us insight into the movie’s backstory–which is, how does this youth gang version of the Foot Clan works.
We even get a sense of what the tragedy of the Shredder’s plan is with Danny and Splinter’s confrontation–that ninjitsu is being used FOR EVIL rather than good. That Shredder is, in his own weird way, the Anti-Splinter who takes Teenagers and turns them into monsters. Like, ironically, Mister Miyagi’s archnemesis in The Karate Kid. It’s not DEEP storytelling but it *is* storytelling.
Here? It’s just such a giant mess.
And horrible as Turtles in Time was, I will disagree with you there that it is worse. It’s a coherent plot, sort of, that–okay it’s worse. I remember it more fondly, though. I can’t say why. As for the CGI movie, I look forward to your perspective on the Turtles vs. Vandal Savage.
Not to speak on TMNT (yet), just to say I love your characterization of it – “Turtles vs. Vandal Savage.” Much better title than they one they actually came up with. I’m also glad I’m not the only one who has to keep looking up Danny’s name. I don’t think I even called him “bad,” just redundant. As you mentioned, he had plenty to do – it was all just stuff done better by previously established characters in the Turtles universe. Including people who star in that film, and the third one, but were mysteriously absent from the second.
You’re not the only one who views the third film more favorably than Secret of the Ooze. If I have the time, I’ll try to examine why. It might have something to do with both films being complete messes of missed opportunity.
You’re welcome for the footage and the resurfaced trauma. *heals sanity damage via quicktime event, David Cage style*
i had never noticed the simpsons product placement before this review.. now I want a bart simpson drinking glass..
You and me both, dude. You and me both.